i cant believe i broke down during dance juz now. wth.
and not only once.
despite all the assurance to my frens tt im not scared of being retained.
deep down inside.. i know im like damn scared. argh i hate the weak me. :(
and some many stuff happened.
i dun like to dance anymore..
yet i have to force myself to go for it
and its gonna be worst when xx trng starts.
cos my body will so break down.
i dun exactly hate him
but i seriously dread his lessons and teaching style.
im so torn between whether to keep stuff from fj.
sigh. why muz all this happen?
a week ago we were happily talking bout how similar we are..
and now.. as in today..i finally got to realise how our frequency dun meet
and how my usual complaints will hurt her.
sigh.
tts it. im gonna force myself to keep everything from her.


the only thing im basically looking forward to now
is GEFANG STUFF! wow singing lessons...
cip... other activities.
although its juz a minor cca
how many times have i repeated how much i enjoy it!
dance is fun..cos there are so many pple i can talk to..
and preparing for maf was fun with u guys..
open hse..i bet so too.
but today i rly wasnt in a good mood. sorry.
and as long as i tink of the xx lesson on sat.
i feel like dying and killing myself.
why mus dance..something which used to make me happy.. become a burden now?


some crap person(i dunno who) let out info tt mr teo said one person failed in my class.
so who is it? hahaha. the first one anyone would tink of is me lar!
yayyy. im gonna fail chem
and get retained.
my future is damn bleak


life is screwed.


sometimes i wonder why my life is so so so screwed up as compared to many xing fu pple.
sometimes i dream and wish tt maybe something good is gonna happen to me in future..so i have to suffer now.
i really hope tt something good happens.
something impossible but good.
pls let it happen and make all my suffering worthwhile.